Can my adoption be a secret?

pregnant considering adoption

Facing an unplanned pregnancy can be hard. You may be feeling shame over your situation and would rather keep your pregnancy, and maybe your adoption plan, a secret. Or maybe you feel like it’s simply not anyone else’s business, or you’re afraid they won’t support you. There are lots of factors to consider when deciding who to tell, when to share, and what you want to tell those around you. You are in the driver’s seat of your story, and all of our services are confidential. It may be most appropriate to choose not to involve family and friends who are not supportive of your decision. We will respect your decision and provide you with support through your journey!

As you consider for yourself who, what, and how you may like to share, first remember that this is YOUR story, your child, and your choice. Lifeline is committed to providing you with a safe space for you to share what’s going on in your life without the fear that it will be shared. All of our services are confidential.

This is important, because we don’t want you to have to do this alone! Adoption is a beautiful option, but it comes with grief and loss, just like all of your unplanned pregnancy options. You will likely need your people to be there for you in the hard moments and to celebrate with you in the good moments. It may be a comfort to know that someone else knows about the baby you made a caring plan for. Having a pregnancy counselor work with you to identify these people in your life and decide what you’d like to say can make this process easier.

No matter what the future holds, this baby will always be a part of your story and a special part of you. It may be hard to go back to living exactly the same way you did before your baby. Sometimes trying to pretend like nothing happened can cause you to feel lonely. This is another reason why having a safe person in your life who you can trust with this information may be helpful.

Our team would love to support you in this process and help you identify people in your life who may be allies during your process. Sharing about your plan can be scary and there are no guarantees about how someone will react. But I think you will be glad to know that there is someone there who knows what you’re going through and can be a supportive, listening ear.

You can reach out to one of our local pregnancy counselors through our 24/7 FREE, HOTLINE by live chat, text, or phone at 1-800-875-5595.  Or you can submit a request  for one of our Pregnancy Counselors to reach out to you.

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